A Complicated Kindness

A Complicated Kindness

Book • 2019

This “darkly funny and provocative” coming-of-age novel balances grief and hope in the voice of a witty teenage girl whose Canadian family is shattered by fundamentalist Christianity (O, The Oprah Magazine).

From the author of Women Talking—now an Academy Award-winning film starring Claire Foy, Rooney Mara, Frances McDormand, and Jessie Buckley

“Half of our family, the better–looking half, is missing,” Nomi Nickel tells us at the beginning of A Complicated Kindness. Left alone with her sad, peculiar father, her days are spent piecing together why her mother and sister have disappeared and contemplating her inevitable career at Happy Family Farms, a chicken slaughterhouse on the outskirts of East Village. Not the East Village in New York City where Nomi would prefer to live, but an oppressive town founded by Mennonites on the cold, flat plains of Manitoba, Canada.

This darkly funny novel is the world according to the unforgettable Nomi, a bewildered and wry sixteen–year–old trapped in a town governed by fundamentalist religion and in the shattered remains of a family it destroyed. In Nomi's droll, refreshing voice, we're told the story of an eccentric, loving family that falls apart as each member lands on a collision course with the only community any of them have ever known. A work of fierce humor and tragedy by a writer who has taken the American market by storm, this searing, tender, comic testament to family love will break your heart.

Bara says...

Ages 16+, but every child is different

The mature subject matter involves intense themes of family abandonment, religious trauma, and the existential angst of adolescence. The narrative complexity and dark, provocative tone require a level of emotional maturity typically found in older teenagers.

Content Safety Breakdown

Detailed breakdown of potentially concerning content

Sex & Nudity

2/5

The story features teenage romantic interests and suggestive dialogue regarding relationships within a repressive community. There is no explicit content, but there are discussions about teenage attraction and rebellion.

Violence & Gore

2/5

The setting includes a chicken slaughterhouse, which creates a somber, industrial tone involving animal processing. While not graphic in a horror sense, the environment is inherently unpleasant and gritty.

Profanity

3/5

The protagonist uses rebellious language to express her frustration, including occasional use of words like f*ck, sh*t, and d*mn, typically used in casual conversation or internal monologues to reflect her cynical outlook.

Alcohol, Drugs & Smoking

3/5

There are references to substance use, including smoking and drug consumption, which the protagonist utilizes as an act of defiance against the strict rules of her fundamentalist town.

Frightening Scenes

3/5

The narrative deals with heavy themes of family abandonment, grief, and the psychological toll of growing up in an oppressive, dogmatic environment. The intensity is largely emotional rather than physical, focusing on a teenager's struggle for identity.

Key Insights

Quick summary and important considerations

This story follows a girl trying to find her place in the world while dealing with a difficult home life and a community that expects her to follow strict rules.

Content Warnings

Abandonment
Emotional neglect

Detailed Analysis

In-depth insights for parents and educators

What Parents Need to Know

The themes focus heavily on the consequences of rigid religious doctrine and the psychological toll of family displacement. Content is sophisticated and focuses on the internal emotional experience of a teenager.

What Kids Can Learn

Viewers can explore the value of questioning authority, the complexities of grief, and how to maintain personal integrity in restrictive environments.

Key Topics Discussed

Coming-of-age
Fundamentalist religion
Grief and loss

Why Parents Might Like It

It provides a sharp, poignant, and darkly humorous examination of belief systems and the enduring strength of the human spirit.

Positives & Learning

What makes this content valuable for children

Positive Messages

3/5

Emphasizes the importance of individual identity and critical thinking when faced with repressive societal expectations. It highlights the endurance of love within broken family structures.

Positive Role Models

2/5

Nomi acts as a relatable, albeit cynical, protagonist navigating difficult choices; while she displays resilience, her struggle with trauma and isolation limits her utility as a conventional role model.

Diverse Representations

3/5

Provides a specific, grounded look into Mennonite culture and the impact of fundamentalism, offering rare insight into an insular religious community.

Educational Value

3/5

Encourages discussion regarding the intersection of religion, culture, and individual agency; offers a critique of fundamentalist societal structures.

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